My Beloved
by Otaku the Dearest
Summary: Warning: BoyxBoy! Lemon in later chapters!When Snape receives a letter from Harry, and is NOT aloud to open it until Harry says it's okay, what will the Slytherin do? After all those years of having the letter, however, he is given the okay, but, is it too late for him to ever know what Harry really meant?


My Beloved,

When I see your face, there is not one bad thing that could ever cross my mind. The way that you look at me, putting your whole sole into your glance and making me feel a heat that I've longed for forever. I love you, and yet you haven't the slightest idea what I'm going through right now.

I love you so much, and I'll never be able to tell you how I feel. Even though I don't think it would be because of you, but because of how I think you could possibly react to me telling you. I really just want to be with you, but then the image of you just out right rejecting me makes me feel as though Death had come for a surprise visit. Whenever I think of this possibility, my heart sinks to the bottom of my stomach, and my sight blurs to where I have to stand still and catch my breath before I collapse.

I know that the gap between us is fairly laughable, but I still wish we could be together, forever and always. Never knowing what could have been, makes me feel terrible and feel as if I have abandoned all hope. But, when as I write this letter, I feel as if maybe you'll somehow understand my feelings and perhaps you'll think of me from time to time. Now that I have gone, I apologize from the bottom of my heart that I am not there for you to pick on or hold onto anymore, but, hopefully one day you may forgive me. I advise you to make an exact copy of you with one of your potions or spells, please do as I say; it just might help you in the end. For me, please.

Well, I suppose I should leave off with one last good bye. Severus, I love you with my whole body. I love you more than anything in this entire universe, and this is my last dying wish. Be safe.

-Harry

I put the letter down, analyzing every last detail again and again, making sure I didn't miss a single thing. Now, I understand what was going through his mind all these years, and all these years, I treated him like some snot nosed prat. Although it never occurred to me that a 5th year student could have such sincere feelings, as to where that was the year that he had written and given me the letter, and really mean them. All his life, the remaining 3 that he had, he spent them all training to become stronger. He wanted to be stronger to protect everyone, and even myself. I always wondered why he gave me this letter in such secrecy, and warned me about what would happen if I opened it before I was supposed to…

**3 Years Ago:**

"Snape, you are not to open this letter until I give you the okay, you understand?" he smiled wickedly as he handed me the small envelope with his messy scrawl on the cover. I cocked my head at how this young 15 year-old would ever have the enough courage, or balls, to come up to the notorious 'Greasy Bat of the Potions Lab'. But, I have to give him some credit on doing so, so I grabbed the letter from him gently, and smiled at the youth for the first time in his life, I think…

"Alright, Harry, but I will not wait forever I hope you know." I looked down at the youth, and caught a glint of sorrow in his eyes. "Don't worry Snape, it will seem like a long time, but I promise it won't be forever." He turned to leave my potions lab, but a reluctant hand grabbed at his shoulder, turning him around in shock. "What is that supposed to mean, exactly?" I questioned in the all-knowing curious tone that I have. He turned his head towards me, and I got the answer from the look he gave me. 'I'm not telling.' It screamed it loud and clear, right into my face. Then, he turned and walked away, not saying a single word to me. It is as if he was trying to make me even more curious then I already was, and that left me pissed and confused for the rest of the evening.

**Present Time:**

As I sit at the table, my heart is racing and everything in my mind is screaming at me, 'What the Hell are you thinking about you twit?', and all I could think about was the way that Harry had projected all his feelings of love out to me so… maturely. I mean, he was only 15 when he had written this letter, and he had to have planned this out perfectly over the last few years. What the Hell is this?

Then it finally hit me, what the Hell was Potter trying to tell me? He… was in love with me? That is the most absurd thing that I have ever heard in my whole 38 years on this Earth. Whenever I saw him after that, he always _did_ have this weird way that he would look at me. But, that doesn't explain a single rational thing in my mind. Why me? Why did he have to fall for me, out of all the powerful wizards out there? Plus, I am a male, not a beautiful woman that would perfectly fit on his shoulder.

Outraged, I stood up and walked out of the dreary chambers that I felt so comfortable in, and headed for the Gryffindor chambers. Now that I think back, the way that he told me that I could open the letter was very odd, to say the very least.

**2 Hours Ago:**

As I walked to my old and dingy quarters, a small tap and a tug at my robes came to grab me into the attention that was Potter. "Hello Potter, what is it? Are you alright?" I placed my hands gingerly on his small shoulders (Has he been eating properly?), and looked deep within his eyes, only seeing one thing that I would never expect to see in a lifetime of mine. Looking, I clearly saw that his spirit was dead and that he was dead along with it. When I saw that, I don't know why, but I called out to the boy. "Harry? Are you alright?"

He looked up, and faked a smile. "Yes, I'm fine, but I fear not for long." He laughed a little wryly at himself as if it were an inside joke. He looked into my eyes once again, and said almost to quietly," I give you the okay, for the letter that is." He smiled lightly, and then turned to walk away. As I looked at him in a puzzled manner, it finally hit me as to what he was saying.

I had kept the letter safely hidden from myself, in the tin that Lily and I used to put flowers in as children. I miss her so much… But anyways, I raced the rest of the way to my quarters to be met by Flitch's idiotic cat. As I moved her at of the way with my foot, I raced inside to find the tin. It had taken me a bloody hour to finally find the godforsaken tin. Opening it, the letter lay at the very bottom, untouched for 3 years. As I grabbed it with gentle hands, almost as if it were to shatter from old age, I opened it and began to read. Finally, I see what Potter concealed in this blasted letter.

**Present Time:**

Now, I marched up to the chambers, I am finally going to solve this letter, and its' writer. What on Earth was he going on about? Potions and love? Oh please…


End file.
